Indulge in a couple hours of empowerment and humor, I recommend it.

My favorite quotes:

… choose to have a journey, instead of just a life.

The planet is here for our delight, but it is also here for us to change, to make it the best it can be. It’s not just about sleeping and fucking and getting the right dress. Lets hope not.

Eric was tall and skinny and Jewish and wore a mohawk and safety pins all over his clothes—which trust me, was super-hot at the time. He was so irreverently and swashbucklingly pirate-handsome that I couldn’t believe my good luck.

…finding your tribe, like following your dreams, isn’t always about what makes sense, it’s about what you soul needs. As much as we’re looking for what turns us on, we’re looking for people who do the same, whether creatively, emotionally, spiritually, or intellectually.

We have a saying in NY, when you’re the most happening person at the party, it’s time to leave.

…if you want to be extra-ordinary–you will not get there by hanging around a bunch of people who tell you you’re not extraordinary. Instead, you will prob become as ordinary as they expect you to be.

Being direct, funny, social and cute—the traits that had often helped me get by—were simply not enough when I was running the show.

If you don’t let what you don’t know stop you from doing your best in every situation, you will surprise yourself over and over in life, as I have.

I also learned that you can’t fake hard work, and that when you believe in something and truly go after it with all you have, amazing things will happen.

Because you can never be too good for the things that first made you successful.

When did spiritual become equated with nice?

Celebrate and cultivate the health, strength, beauty and ease of your physcial body. Be happy in your body. (Steps in Starting Your Own Religion – #12)

Astrologers believe that we don’t become adults until our first Saturn returns, which happens between ages 27 and 30.

Flowing solo this Thanksgiving? We’ve got you covered!…

Not everyone is fortunate enough to spend Thanksgiving with their families. Sometimes it’s work, distance or simply lack there of that prevent us from stuffing with stuffing and negotiating with the last piece of pumpkin pie. Well, if you relate to one of the preceding conditions – here are some bright ideas to keep you pumped with prana (life force) this Thursday!

• DO YOGA at Golden Bridge NYC! – This Thanksgiving Day Join Guru Dharam Singh in a special Kundalini Yoga and Meditation class followed with a community Thanksgiving Day Feast and Gathering. Time: 10:30am – 12:30pm, Meal starts at 1pm. Cost: $25/pre-reg, $35/drop in. More Info: Visit Website

• SALUTE THE SUN at The Om Factory! This would be kind of like the turkey trot for yogis. Ashley Bouldin has built a special morning Thanksgiving class revolving around Sun Salutations – 108 of them, to be exact. But don’t worry, it’s not about how many you do as much as it is the anticipated radiance you’ll feel afterwards.  Start the day in a happy place! Time: 8:30am – 10:00am. Cost: $17 drop in. More Info: Visit Website.

• TREAT THE SENSES at one of NY’s Finest Restaurants! Check out the best Turkey Tables for 2009 at NY Magazine’s Thanksgiving Guide.  Or  for a Vegan Thanksgiving Super Vegan has a great list of locales with menus – Lavender chocolate cheesecake from Blossom anyone?

• BE THE SEER at the 83^rd Annual Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade! Ya know, “when in Rome…” ! Here’s a list of talent you can expect to see in addition to the 1500 cheerleaders, dancers, singers, performers and 800 clowns (no I’m not kidding): Bello, Grandma and the cast of the Big Apple Circus, Andrea Bocelli, Boys Like Girls, Alan Cumming, Billy Currington, DJ Lance Rock and the cast of Yo Gabba Gabba!, Jimmy Fallon and The Roots, Gloria Gaynor, Emily Hughes, Kermit the Frog and Tiffany Thornton, Jane Krakowski, Cyndi Lauper, Ziggy Marley with Judah Marley, Katharine McPhee, Miss America 2009 – Katie Stam, the cast and Muppets of Sesame Street, Mitchel Musso, Keke Palmer, The Pizzarelli Quartet, Jay Sean and Carly Simon.

• VOLUNTEER TIME at the Woodstock Senior Center! Serve the clients restaurant-style at their annual Thanksgiving Lunch. Woodstock is a single resident occupancy hotel in Midtown, is the only source of nutritional meals for many of its members, both the homeless and the housed. Time: 8:30 AM – 2:00 PM. Register first at NY Cares - Website.

• CREATE THEN DONATE! Make a “Blessing Bag”.

Every Thanksgiving season The Bowery Mission distributes “Blessing Bags” containing personal hygiene items and other necessities to the men and women they serve. Below are the listed items to include in your donation! Visit Website.
  • Toothpaste
  • Shampoo
  • Razors
  • Socks (white and black)
  • Hats
  • Toothbrush
  • Deodorant
  • Shaving cream
  • Underwear (all sizes)
  • Gloves
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Stay Healthy and Fit During the Holiday Season

The holidays are a time for celebration, family, joy and lots of merriment. It is also a time that revolves around food, busy shopping, festive parties, cocktails, and seasonal treats. Therefore, the season can represent a time for serious temptation to overeat, forgo the gym and abandon healthy habits. There are ways to stay on track so that when the New Year rolls around you aren’t, yet again, resolving to lose the five pounds you gained over the holidays!

Before the holidays are fully underway, make a conscious effort to make a plan, stick to it and check in regularly with yourself. A healthy outlook plus regular exercise, a consistent sleep schedule and a proper diet go a long way to being successful.

There are many added sources of stress this time of year. We understand fully and are here to help. Exercise is a proven stress reducer and one of the best defenses when things start to get overwhelming. We offer a wide array of classes to get the body moving, work up a sweat and burn calories. Try a new class, maybe spinning, boxing or a dance class. Not only will you relieve holiday stress, you might just find passion for a new activity! Other mind calming, stress reducers are Yoga, Pilates and meditation.

Just finding the time to exercise during the holiday season can be a hurdle. Careful analysis of where you spend your time and how better to manage it may reveal free time you didn’t even realize was there. If you spend countless hours at the mall looking for that perfect gift, try online shopping. Not only does it save time, but it can be done even when the stores are closed.

Even at the end of a busy day there seems to be lots to get done. Try your best to delegate, multitask and organize yourself so you get an adequate amount of sleep. Your body and mind need to rest. Sleep is the time your body recovers. And the less you get the worse off you will be, feeding the vicious cycle. Be sure to find two to three days a week where you get a solid nights sleep to keep you focused, on track and energetic enough to keep up with the demands of the season.

Awareness goes a long way when it comes to holiday parties. Mindless eating, Aunt Betty’s special rum balls, eggnog and seasonal candy are tempting. Be sure to eat a healthy snack to fill you up before going, drink lots of water to maintain fullness and if necessary, bring your own healthy snacks or foods if you get hungry. That’s not to say you must totally abstain from festive goodies. On the contrary, it’s fine to indulge a small amount, enough to satisfy your craving, but know your limits and keep an eye on your consumption.

As merriment abounds so do cocktails. It’s important to keep alcohol consumption to a minimum. Not only does it stimulate appetite, it can disrupt sleep and wreak havoc on your body and mind.

Some tips for combating holiday stress, over indulgence and employing exercise are below. There is no reason you can’t stay on track, enjoy the season and enter the New Year in a healthy and happy place – and avoid the unwanted gift of extra pounds!

• Schedule your workouts like you would a meeting.
• Get 7-8 hours of sleep at least 3 times a week.
• Hit the sack and wake up at the same time every day, including weekends.
• Walk outside in the sunlight to beat the seasonal sadness that tends to happen to many.
• Organize a holiday get together at the gym or an outdoor activity.
• Throw your own party to ensure healthy food is served.
• Give the gift of health to yourself!
• Go easy on the caffeinated drinks. They deplete you of vitamins and can disrupt sleep.
• Try some time-efficient, calorie-incinerating workouts such as jumping rope, running, and training on cardio machines. 30 minutes three times a week is all it takes.
• Skip the elevator or escalator and opt for the stairs.
• Dance at the holiday party, burn calories and have fun.

Special Cred: New York Sports Club

The Skinny on Dehydration 

Dehydration is a simple and common issue – a lack of water, leads to a lack of functionality along with potentially severe symptoms. But, seriously – on hot days in the city like this one (89 degrees and 52% humidity) everyone can use a little reminder! The results are an imbalance in sodium, potassium and chlorides that begin showing signs in ways such as inconvenient lightheadedness, lack of appetite, fatigue, tingling sensation and headache and left un-attended can turn into an serious emergency. Severe symptoms of dehydration include confusion, seizures, raising pulse, vomiting and even coma. And nobody wants that.

How to Prevent It

To help prevent dehydration so your days run smoothly drink plenty of water – it is suggested by some to drink at least 8 glasses a day. Other good beverages include milk, herbal teas, low-sodium broth, 100% fruit and vegetable juices. Looking for a more precise number? Use this hydration calculator which will estimate for you based on your weight, physical activity, climate and other variables – click here. Soft drink beverages count towards your daily fliud intake but keep in mind that they contain extra sugar calories that you may not want to be consuming.

Up Your Quality of Life and Tell Others

It may seem like a basic reminder, but we all know how busy a day can get – sometimes hours go by without any water at all! So, spread the wealth and remind your friends and coworkers to keep up with their h20 intake! (And don’t forget to drink a lot of water after yoga to flush out the toxins and replace the ones you just sweat out! Try not to drink during class, as this is your time to create space and empty out, as opposed to filling up!)

For a list of Ayurvedic home remedies regarding dehydration click here.

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Seeing Your Perfection

::  Letting Your Light Shine ::

     We are each born into this world with unique gifts. Within us is a glimmer of the divine, a light that can potentially make the world a more beautiful place. But in many, that light lies dormant, snuffed out by fears and feelings of inadequacy. To spark it is to attract attention, face the possibility of rejection or the responsibility of success, and risk being labeled immodest. Yet when we undermine the light by hiding our aptitudes and quashing our dreams, we deny ourselves and others a wealth of experiences. Your abilities are a part of who you are and when you take pride in them, you affirm the love, esteem, and trust with which you view yourself. Moreover, as you express the light within, you grant others permission to do the same, freeing them to explore their own talents.

     For some, we are taught to hide our light from the world since childhood. Relatives caution us that the professions associated with our aptitudes are unattainable. Our peers may be envious of our skills and thus overly critical of the activities we instinctively enjoy. And authority figures admonish us to be humble and avoid showing off. But there is a vast chasm that separates those who let their light shine and those who seek only to draw attention to themselves. When you dare to share your light with the world, the beauty and perfection of your soul become clearly visible. You become a whole being—the literal embodiment of your vast potential. Whether you are a wonderful dancer, a first-rate cook, quick with numbers, or a natural negotiator, you’ll come to understand that you do the world no favors when you hold yourself back.

     If you have hidden your light for so long that it has shrunk to an ember, make a list of everything you do well, however impractical, silly, or seemingly inconsequential. Then ask yourself how you can positively utilize those abilities in your daily life. The gifts you were born with were not granted to you arbitrarily. While you may never discover what impact your light has had on others, you can be certain that when you embrace your talents and share them with others, you will spread illumination in the world.

Special Cred: Daily OM, July 27th, 2009

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Why the Imp in your Brain Gets Out

The visions seem to swirl up from the brain’s sewage system at the worst possible times — during a job interview, a meeting with the boss, an apprehensive first date, an important dinner party. What if I started a food fight with these hors d’oeuvres? Mocked the host’s stammer? Cut loose with a racial slur?

“That single thought is enough,” wrote Edgar Allan Poe in “The Imp of the Perverse,” an essay on unwanted impulses. “The impulse increases to a wish, the wish to a desire, the desire to an uncontrollable longing.”

He added, “There is no passion in nature so demoniacally impatient, as that of him who, shuddering upon the edge of a precipice, thus meditates a plunge.”

Or meditates on the question: Am I sick?

In a few cases, the answer may be yes. But a vast majority of people rarely, if ever, act on such urges, and their susceptibility to rude fantasies in fact reflects the workings of a normally sensitive, social brain, argues a paper published last week in the journal Science.

“There are all kinds of pitfalls in social life, everywhere we look; not just errors but worst possible errors come to mind, and they come to mind easily,” said the paper’s author, Daniel M. Wegner, a psychologist at Harvard. “And having the worst thing come to mind, in some circumstances, might increase the likelihood that it will happen.”

The exploration of perverse urges has a rich history (how could it not?), running through the stories of Poe and the Marquis de Sade to Freud’s repressed desires and Darwin’s observation that many actions are performed “in direct opposition to our conscious will.” In the past decade, social psychologists have documented how common such contrary urges are — and when they are most likely to alter people’s behavior.

At a fundamental level, functioning socially means mastering one’s impulses. The adult brain expends at least as much energy on inhibition as on action, some studies suggest, and mental health relies on abiding strategies to ignore or suppress deeply disturbing thoughts — of one’s own inevitable death, for example. These strategies are general, subconscious or semiconscious psychological programs that usually run on automatic pilot.

Perverse impulses seem to arise when people focus intensely on avoiding specific errors or taboos. The theory is straightforward: to avoid blurting out that a colleague is a raging hypocrite, the brain must first imagine just that; the very presence of that catastrophic insult, in turn, increases the odds that the brain will spit it out.

“We know that what’s accessible in our minds can exert an influence on judgment and behavior simply because it’s there, it’s floating on the surface of consciousness,” said Jamie Arndt, a psychologist at the University of Missouri.

The empirical evidence of this influence has been piling up in recent years, as Dr. Wegner documents in the new paper. In the lab, psychologists have people try to banish a thought from their minds — of a white bear, for example — and find that the thought keeps returning, about once a minute. Likewise, people trying not to think of a specific word continually blurt it out during rapid-fire word-association tests.

The same “ironic errors,” as Dr. Wegner calls them, are just easy to evoke in the real world. Golfers instructed to avoid a specific mistake, like overshooting, do it more often when under pressure, studies find. Soccer players told to shoot a penalty kick anywhere but at a certain spot of the net, like the lower right corner, look at that spot more often than any other.

Efforts to be politically correct can be particularly treacherous. In one study, researchers at Northwestern and Lehigh Universities had 73 students read a vignette about a fictional peer, Donald, a black male. The students saw a picture of him and read a narrative about his visit to a mall with a friend.

In the crowded parking lot, Donald would not park in a handicap space, even though he was driving his grandmother’s car, which had a pass, but he did butt in front of another driver to snag a nonhandicap space. He snubbed a person collecting money for a heart fund, while his friend contributed some change. And so on. The story purposely portrayed the protagonist in an ambiguous way.

The researchers had about half the students try to suppress bad stereotypes of black males as they read and, later, judged Donald’s character on measures like honesty, hostility and laziness. These students rated Donald as significantly more hostile — but also more honest — than did students who were not trying to suppress stereotypes.

In short, the attempt to banish biased thoughts worked, to some extent. But the study also provided “a strong demonstration that stereotype suppression leads stereotypes to become hyperaccessible,” the authors concluded.

Smokers, heavy drinkers and other habitual substance users know this confusion too well: the effort to squelch a longing for a smoke or a drink can bring to mind all the reasons to break the habit; at the same time, the desire seemingly gets stronger.

The risk that people will slip or “lose it” depends in part on the level of stress they are undergoing, Dr. Wegner argues. Concentrating intensely on not staring at a prominent mole on a new acquaintance’s face, while also texting and trying to follow a conversation, heightens the risk of saying: “We went to the mole — I mean, mall. Mall!”

“A certain relief can come from just getting it over with, having that worst thing happen, so you don’t have to worry about monitoring in anymore,” Dr. Wegner said.

All of which might be hard to explain, of course, if you’ve just mooned the dinner party.

Special Cred: Benedict Carey, NYTimes

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Whether you’re young or old, good health, stalwart friends and financial security are the best predictors of happiness, according to a new survey on aging by the Pew Research Center.

The new survey shows that levels of happiness are roughly constant across age groups, despite platitudes about the bliss of youth. Among older adults, happiness tended to vary little with gender or race, the survey also found.

Still, key factors separate the happy from the unhappy.

Unsurprisingly, people in excellent health were 25 percent more likely to say they were “very happy” compared to those in poorer health, the survey found. Feeling financially prepared for retirement and having good friends were associated with similarly increased odds that people would describe themselves as happy.

Happiness intrigues scientists. While it’s clear that good health contributes to one’s contentment, many researchers think the reverse is also true — that happiness leads to good health. But the mechanisms are not clear, said Marlene Lee, a senior research associate at the Population Reference Bureau, a nonprofit research organization.

“It’s just absolutely fascinating that your happiness can not only lead to your health, but also to other people’s happiness and their health,” Ms. Lee said.  

As people age, their social networks shrink, scientists have found. But while having fewer social outlets may negatively influence health, the intensity and emotional connection of the remaining relationships increases with age, which may help compensate for fewer social ties.

Scientists strongly suspect that expectations and the ability to adapt to changing life circumstances also influence happiness. Ms. Lee said people who adjust their expectations as their social networks and lifestyles change may avoid feelings of loneliness and isolation, which are linked to illness and earlier death.

What do you think are the essential ingredients for happiness later in life? For more on the new survey, see “How Old Do You Feel? It Depends on Your Age” in today’s Times and read the full report. Share your thoughts below.  

Special Cred: Article by Sarah Arnquist from the New York Times Blog, nytimes.com/newoldage.com.